Personal Log: OPS Lt. Cmdr. Solan Arquette

Personal log, Stardate six-nine-seven-one-eight point zero.

My last day as Chief Operations Officer aboard Pandora Station is over. It's... I won't say it has been hard for me; it's something everyone in Starfleet comes to expect, or so I've been told... but... It's not an easy thing, leaving your first posting. I suppose it's a bit like leaving home and family in some ways, though I have to admit I never really felt that way when I left home. Then again, I never much cared for my home.

But this is different, and I'm not entirely sure why.

Things are changing here; I'm not sure if it's for better or worse. Most of us are either leaving Pandora or stepping down from our posts. Captain Kane will be remaining behind on Pandora – I think I'm going to miss him; he was a good man – but not as captain. He's decided to spend more time with his daughter, and his replacement, Captain Berann, doesn't seem nearly as good natured as Captain Kane. Vok, Vrass and Doctor Truesdale will all be remaining behind as, of course, will Virt – who I still do not feel comfortable around despite myself. But the rest of us appear to be transferring to other duty stations.

I don't know why, but for some reason I feel like something has happened. As though something we did caused Starfleet HQ to decide to have nearly the entire senior staff, among whom I number apparently, transferred away. No one seems entirely happy about this, least of all Jalando who, while he tries to hide it, isn't nearly as good as he thinks he is. It's not that he broods, per se, but... something in the way that he moves has changed. I don't know. I try not to think about it. He and I have never gotten along well, though, of course, we do our duties as best we can. With the incident at Delta One things have only gotten worse; part of that is my avoiding his company to the best of my abilities and part, I think, is his not having forgiven me. Which I can understand.

Now he and I will serve aboard the USS Odyssey together as well. I don't look forward to that. And yet, I'm glad there will be a familiar face there – aside, of course, from my mate. She'll be joining me there, of course.

I'm rambling.

I'm nervous, I suppose. Cadenza says that I'm ready for this new assignment, and I am confident in my abilities; I'm just... Honestly I'm not sure what's wrong. Maybe it's just the newness of it all. That, and leaving what I've come to know intimately. I think Commander Jalando may be feeling some of that as well – I caught him staring at, and touching, a bulk-head the other day, quite by accident, and he acted like nothing was out of the ordinary when I passed him. I've only been on Pandora a little over a year; I can't imagine how hard it will be for him to leave her.

I'm rambling again.

It's getting late, and I have a lot of packing to do before I get with Cadenza tomorrow, so I'll end this.

Computer, end log.

Computer, addendum to personal log, Stardate six-nine-seven-one-eight point zero.

I need to speak with Lieutenant Nerell, who will be my AOPS aboard the Odyssey regarding a promotion for Ensign Gatto. I feel that she deserves it, but I remain unsure of myself when it comes to her place in my department. I think I'll make dealing with promotions his job in any event, as it will give me more room to deal with department issues; I've heard he is a trill, and that his symbiont was formerly joined with another operations officer. I will make this decision after meeting with him tomorrow.

End log.

Chief Operations Officer's log, Stardate six-nine-seven-one-five point six.

Today I make my last log as the Chief Operations Officer aboard Pandora Station. Tomorrow my duties begin aboard the USS Odyssey, and I begin my very own odyssey. That having been said, there are a number of things that need to be noted for the future Ops – in my case I suspect it will be Ensign Kaylin, at least temporarily. She has proven an able leader, and I done well during my absences.

There is little to report today, and so the log should be short.

The first order of business is Lieutenant Kaylin; due to her skill as an officer and efforts to improve this station, I would suggest she be made Chief Operations Officer of Pandora Station. While I realize this is not a formal statement -- which will also be made -- the advice of the out-going Ops is usually viewed in favourable light. I hope it is this time as well.

I believe that promotions are due for the following individuals in the Operations Department, all of whom will be remaining aboard Pandora Station: Ensign Pa'rel; Senior Chief Petty Officer Roberts; Chief Petty Officer Calderon; Chief Petty Officer Al'Ala; Crewman T'ren, Crewman Davies; Crewman Warren.

I believe that commendations should be awarded to the following individuals in the Operations Department, all of whom will be remaining aboard Pandora Station: Senior Chief Petty Officer Jonathon Roberts, for time in-service and Crewman Alder-Wicksman, for putting his life on the line for a fellow crewman.

I will be putting in formal requests for these individuals this afternoon.

In more mundane matters, the presence of the Odyssey has caused the station power supplies to be depleted more rapidly than is to be expected; I have spoken with engineer Lieutenant Janssens about this, and they noted the drain as well. He and Kaylin have spent the majority of the day searching for the reason behind this loss, but as yet have not found it; I suspect that it will not be discovered until after the Odyssey departs, but I am all but certain it will not be before tomorrow when I transfer command to Lieutenant Kaylin.

Fortunately nothing else seems to be interfering with the repair of the Odyssey, and for that I am grateful. I have spoken only once with Lieutenant Helfrump, current Ops aboard the Odyssey, and he assures me that Engineering has plenty of supplies to repair the transwarp engines on time, and possibly even ahead of schedule. Our own supplies are in excellent condition still.

End log.

Personal Log, Stardate six-nine-five-one-six point five.

With the small crew compliment aboard the Solstice currently, finding a day of leave was difficult but not impossible, and I'm glad for it. After the past two days – particularly yesterday – I think it's important that I take a break, if only temporarily.

Ensign Gatto and myself were under the influence of an alien entity for near twenty-four hours – perhaps more, we cannot be certain. Although I have requested, and been granted, forgiveness for my words and actions while under the mental influence of the entity, I do not believe that I feel any more comfortable in the presence of Commander Jalando than I have in the past. Even moreso, now, because of what has been said – because of my own words. To be short, I accused Commander Jalando of being under the control of an alien entity and attempting to harm Starfleet personnel and property, as well as citizens and non-citizens of the Federation aboard Delta One. As it turns out, he was right in accusing us, in accusing me, of being under the influence of another.

That in itself is difficult for me to accept. I have always prided myself on my mental fortitude which, while not on par with Cadenza's, is certainly nothing to scoff at. It has, in my opinion, been largely responsible for my rapid rise through the ranks of Starfleet. Now, however, I am forced to question my own strength. Will I have residual effects from this unwilling interference (ironically, one of the things I accused Jalando of suffering), or have I totally escaped the mental control of this... parasite? Symbiont? Of this alien entity?

Cadenza assures me that I remain strong, though I don't feel such surety.

As is not bad, however. Cadenza and I have decided, I suspect even without the influence of the alien entity, to become 'mates,' as she calls us. I'm not entirely certain what this entails. The word 'mate' implies, to me at least, more than simply 'dating,' which I did at the Academy. I am, of course, committed to our relationship. I find myself entranced by her – her beauty, of course, but mostly by her native intelligence and the emotions that lie hidden beneath the surface. Those things she shows me in moments between us. Or do I imagine those things?

I don't think so.

Mates.

I'm glad we visited Delta One, all things considered. It has made me aware of a weakness in myself that I had never even considered. Hopefully I can overcome it. Hopefully. I look forward to seeing Cadenza tonight at dinner.

End log.